The Dreaded Cup

Attention First Time Moms: DO NOT EVER PUT YOUR CHILD TO BED WITH A CUP!!

I am embarrassed to say that Eli still does not sleep through the night. Prior to last week, he was doing better and only waking up once during the night, but he came down with a cold last week that has disrupted even that terrible schedule and we are back to waking up three times. He wakes up screaming, I give him a sippy cup with a little bit of milk, and he goes back to sleep. In other words, his comfort tool is his cup. I've tried putting a sippy cup of water in the crib, but he made it very obvious that he was having none of that B.S. Finally, I've decided to start battling the cup. Since the little patience I do possess is pretty much depleted to nil at 3am, I decided to first battle putting him to bed with the cup. We've adjusted our routine to include a few minutes of reading prior to bed where he drinks his milk. Then we go to bed without our cup. The first night went ok. He only cried for a few minutes. The second night was about the same, but last night he lost it entirely. He screamed bloody murder for about 45 minutes. (To give you an idea of how loud he was, he has a box fan in his room on full blast, and I was at the desk about 10 feet from the dish washer which was running full blast and I could still hear him as if his door was open.) Finally, I couldn't take it anymore. I went into his room and cuddled him, loved him, and patted him until he calmed down and fell asleep. I absolutely can not handle the fact that I am doing this to him. Another child didn't hit him and make him cry. He didn't fall and make himself cry. No! He is crying because his Mother has decided that he can't have his cup because I want to sleep. I am doing this to him. I know logically that it will eventually be for the best, that he needs his sleep just as much as I do, but that doesn't make me feel any less like a complete jerk and terrible mother. Eli is such a sweet boy......if I could just get him to sleep through the night, he would be as near to perfect as you can get.