A New System

My friend Brandy mentioned a marble reward system that she was considering for her kids. It sounded great to me. A way to concentrate on the good behavior and not so much on the bad behavior.

So I bought a jar

And some pom pom balls, well, cause the thought of having a bunch of marbles within reach of The Boy gave me the willies.

And then I sat down and explained the plan to Hannah. She will get a pom pom ball for each good thing she does. Getting a blue at school, being polite and nice to her brother and others, helping out around the house, keeping her room cleaned, etc. The jar is pretty big so I wanted her to have as many opportunities to gain pom poms as I could provide. As we sat there and discussed the jar, and I gave examples of ways for her to earn pom pom balls I through a ball in the jar for each example I could think over the past few days. By the time I was down she had already earned 9 pom pom balls.

Her reward will be earned when she fills the jar up. We discussed the rewards. I gave her a few examples like an ice cream date at Baskin Robins, or a movie date. I asked her to think about other things she really wanted, to let me know what they were, and we could add them to the list. Her immediate choices made me smile. She wanted to add a trip to visit Grandma and Grandpa with the swing, and a visit to Chuck E Cheese. Easy enough choices!

Then the bad news arrived. For every bad behavior a ball will be taken away. Being mean to her brother, not using her manners, or getting bad marks at school. She didn't seemed as phased by this as I expected her to be. I realized why later.

A few hours after our discussion we were in the front yard playing. Hannah had the box of side walk chalk and Eli wanted some. Hannah rudely told him he couldn't touch the chalk. She lost a ball. Some arguing commenced and by the time I was able to get both of my screaming children in the house, she lost a total of 3 balls. I was so frustrated, but the look on her face as I removed the 3 balls gave me hope that she was beginning to get it.

After that I didn't have any problems from her. She picked up her room, took a bath, and got ready for bed without issue. So she earned a ball back.

I don't know if this system will work for us, or if I'll even remember to use the system after today, but I'm hoping that it will help us start concentrating on the good things Hannah does and allow her to reap the rewards with some special time with her Daddy and I.

Wish us Luck!